If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
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