Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
