is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
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