my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
My dad is sitting where you rode me
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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