dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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