The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Small penises have feelings too.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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