Did you just see the Batmobile???
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
