another moral hangover. fuck.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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