So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
dude. I can hear the air.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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