You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize