His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
