Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
