You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
