Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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