you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
