I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
