it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica