I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
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You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
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