? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
dude i'm inner monologue high
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
