Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
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