Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Did you just see the Batmobile???
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
