I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
