Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
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