normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Randomize
