flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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