can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Randomize
