So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
This toilet bowl is my home.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize