I'm lost and stupid without you.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
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