similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
