i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
