She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
