I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
