I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I am one with the molecules
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
