Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Randomize
