Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
