i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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