You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
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i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."