you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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