I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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