I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize
