went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
I'm really busy with my period
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