I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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