Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
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