yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
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