so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
