He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I am available for nakedness
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
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