what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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