We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Im part way to drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize