I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
