it hurts more in the daytime
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize