The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Randomize
