our cab driver is having phone sex.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
